Point/Counterpoint - The Big Boppers

Dan Akroyd - Alvaro Quiros won the Omega Dubai Desert Classic today, beating a field that included the top three ranked golfers in the world.  Meanwhile, Dustin Johnson is coming off a two win season on the US PGA Tour.  Which under 30 bomber would you choose?  This will be the subject of tonight’s Point/Counterpoint; Jane will take the Dustin Johnson point and I will take the Alvaro Quiros counterpoint. 

Jane Curtin - Dan, you self-important jerk, the fact that you would choose Quiros over Johnson speaks to either your hatred of America or the side effect of some sort of brain injury.  Johnson has won four times on the US Tour (twice at demanding Pebble Beach) and was a factor in two of the four majors last year.  Your boy Quiros’ best performance on the biggest stage was a tie for 11th at last years Open Championship.  In fact, in six of the eight majors Quiros played in he was more of a seamstress than a golfer; cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut.  And if you don’t want to believe me, believe math; Johnson smashes Quiros in the world rankings; 14 to 36. 

DA - Jane you ignorant slut.  If you were more concerned about the facts and less concerned about getting a private viewing of Johnson’s eight iron, you would see Quiros is the easy choice.  Quiros has won five times in Europe, including the most recent win between the two.  Even in the schoolgirl crush world you live in five is more than four.  He has won tournaments in each of the last five years, showing his consistency.  And speaking of consistency, only a dullard like you would consider Johnson’s performances in the majors last year a virtue.  He choked like a dog at the US Open and didn’t know the rules of golf at the PGA Championship. 

JC – Ha!  As if the fact you want to see Quiros' Spanish Armanda isn’t the reason you are backing him.  You mention his five wins in Europe.  That at $6.25 will buy you something nice at Starbucks.  Call me when he does anything in America, also known as the big leagues.  The one good thing about Alvaro Quiros is now I know how to say Colin Montgomerie in Spanish.

DA – You speak as if Johnson has been tearing it up this year.  Quiros has a first and a second already in 2011.  The best Johnson has done this year is third, when he wasn’t running home from Hawaii because the gossip pages said something bad about him.  For god’s sake, man up.

JC – That is Point/Counterpoint

DA – Good night and have a pleasant tomorrow.