Daddy, What Did Tiger Do?

This is a conversation between father and son discussing the recent Tiger Woods incident.

DAD: Well, son, he had a fight with his wife, left the house to meet his New York mistress, hit a fire hydrant and a tree.

SON: Gosh, Dad. Is that in the paper or on TV?

DAD: Well, actually, that's what a lot of people think might have happened.

SON:"So, nobody knows for sure? It's kind of like a rumor? Or gossip?

DAD: Well, if you put it that way, yes. But, he won't even talk with the State Police investigating the accident, so he must be guilty.

SON: You're sh*ing me, right?

DAD: Watch your language. Just don't grow up like him. He also throws golf clubs and uses four-letter words on the golf course.

SON: Don't other golfers throw clubs and curse?

DAD: Of course, you little idiot. But, they are only on the TV screen for 2-3 seconds per year, so you have to be pretty quick to catch them.

SON: You're sh*ing me, right?